2 NOVEMBER
Dedicated to all fat cats politicians.

Gertrude and Stanislao are two characters in The Diary of Hurricane Johnny.
2 November is All Souls' Day.

From one of my cabaret shows in Milan where I performed with other amateurs, with a monologue on facts and people known to all spectators.
I was an 18-year-old student.
Sitting in the front row was a short, but extra large obese woman, she sat on two chairs, one for each butt, she looked like Gertrude, headmaster of Hurricane Johnny’s college.
Sitting next to her was her husband, tall, lanky, moustache turned upwards, he looked like Stanislao, headmaster of Hurricane Johnny’s college.
Gertrude was bejewelled, her scent (stink) wafting throughout the room, carrion face, her eyes bloodshot.

I began my monologue, the spectators were having fun, open laughter, etc.
Gertrude, who had come only to insult, began to interrupt me:
Enough of this crap,
Stop it, you are pitiful,
(The spectators “stop it ma'am, we're having fun”)
Gertrude continued with her insults.
Go to work, you rascal,
You fool, you pissed me off!

At this point I lost my patience, I stared at her and, with a very sweet smile, I told her: “Ma'am, you are absolutely right, I apologise. I'm out of the way, I'm sorry I ruined your evening. I wish you a lovely time."
I started going down the three steps of the stage, I stopped on the second step, and smiling, I asked her “Forgive me for asking, ma'am, but, on 2 November, are you going to visit the pork butcher?"

Ice silence in the room for a few seconds.
Then an open ovation, American-style whistles, everyone standing and applauding.
Gertrude didn't understand, she looked around.
Stanislao whispered in her ear.
Gertrude turned purple with anger, she got up, and she headed towards the exit, walking like a shaking round cup.
A rhythmic clapping of hands accompanied her exit.
I've never had so much fun doing stand-up cabaret.

P.S. Should you not understand the pun, please ask me.